🕵️ A detective club for people who shout at Poirot
It's never the butler.(It's sometimes the butler.)
Recruit your group chat into a detective agency. Solve gloriously silly cosy mysteries together — stolen sourdough, vanished moustaches, ghosts with schedules — and settle, once and for all, which of your friends would survive an Agatha Christie novel. (None of you. But it'll be close.)
No experience required. Unearned confidence essential.
How the club works
Three steps. Two are easy. One involves your group chat agreeing on a name.
1.Found your agency
One brave soul creates the agency and drops the join code into the group chat. WhatsApp is the club's official recruitment channel — the invitation writes itself. Literally. There's a button.
2.Work the cases together
Search scenes, interrogate suspects, crack ciphers, pin timelines. Compare theories in the group chat. Watch your most confident friend accuse the wrong baker in front of everyone.
3.Climb the ranks
Earn brass buttons and reputation. Rise from Tea Fetcher to Consulting Legend. Outrank your friends on the agency roster, which is what friendship is for.
Currently on the board 🧵
8 cases on the board today. New mysteries pinned most Fridays, whether the village is ready or not.
Case No. 001 · 🔍FREE
The Purloined Sourdough
An 84-year-old sourdough starter is missing. The village bake-off is tomorrow. Nobody is calm.
Case No. 002 · 🔍🔍
The Vanishing Moustache of Major Trumpington
A championship moustache, insured for £10,000, shaved off in the night. The victim slept through it. Allegedly.
Case No. 003 · 🔍🔍🔍
The Ghost of Gramophone Hall
Every night at 3:07 a.m., the ballroom gramophone plays 'Cheek to Cheek'. The hotel is emptying. The ghost has a schedule.
Case No. 004 · 🔍
The Great Marrow Incident II
The champion marrow of Little Snodbury has been kidnapped, blanket and all. The village said this could never happen again. Again.
Case No. 005 · 🔍🔍
The Ashes of Old Walter
The centenary of the Dribbling Ashes is on Saturday, and the urn — containing the actual ashes of a beloved tea trolley — has vanished from a locked case.
Case No. 006 · 🔍🔍
What the Butler Saw
The reel has vanished from the pier's famous mutoscope — the night after the fortune teller predicted it would. Nobody knows what the butler saw. Everybody has a theory.
Case No. 007 · 🔍🔍🔍
The Impossible Theft on the 11:59
The Pentwhistle tiara vanished from a locked sleeper compartment between Crewe and Carlisle. The train never stopped. Nobody got on. Nobody got off. Something, however, got in.
Case No. 008 · 🔍🔍🔍
The Last Bottle of Foxwhistle Abbey
The legendary 1898 port — kept forty years for the Abbey's finest hour — has vanished from a locked cellar, three days before the new lord meant to drink it. The club has sent its very best. And you.
Inside every case
Interrogations
Ask the right question and suspects crumble. Ask the wrong one and they offer you a scone.
Ciphers
Coded telegrams, secret ledgers, apology notes thrown in bins. Bring your alphabet.
Evidence sorting
Solid evidence or red herring? The Butler is watching, and he has opinions.
Timelines
Reconstruct the night in question from villagers who remember everything except what matters.
Your detective
Coats, hats, companions. Earn a bloodhound named Colin. Earn a fez. We won't judge. He will.
Atmosphere
Candlelit manors, foggy moors, gramophones with schedules. Cosy on the outside, mystery in the middle.
Word around the village
All testimonials fictional. All feelings real.
“Five stars. I was the culprit.”
“They accused me in front of the whole village hall. I have never felt so alive.”
“The haunting is now twice nightly, with a matinée. Fully booked till spring.”
“I did not do it.”
The first case is free.
A sourdough starter is missing in Little Snodbury and, frankly, you seem like exactly the sort of busybody the situation demands.
Take the case 🍞Then £4.99/month for the whole agency-of-you. Cancel any time. The Butler will pretend not to mind.